before i got my herpes i noticed that my husband had a small blister on his penis is that where i could have gotten it from? We had only been together for a short time when i got them and it had been close to 2 years prior to that that i had been with someone. i'd like to know if that's a possiblity of where i got them from. and can i ever have a normal sex life again, and since i got them my sexual drive is down could that be the reason?
Usually, if you are going to have outbreaks, you get the first one less than a week after you contract the virus. BUT, in unusual cases, you can harbor the virus in your body for years before you have an outbreak or find out you have it. That is why it is nearly impossible to know who gave it to you. No test can ever tell you how long you have had herpes. That is a myth! It probably was your husband, but it is possible it was someone before him, even if it was over two years earlier. If your husband had a small blister, that was probably herpes. If it makes you feel better, you can ask him to have a blood test to see if he has it. BUT, if he does, you still cannot be sure if you gave it to him or he gave it to you. If he doesn't have it, you can be sure you got it from someone else.
Yes, you can have a normal sex life, but it may take a while for the outbreaks and pain to feel better again. Also, if you are married to the man who gave it to you, and plan to stay married, that makes your life a whole lot easier, because you don't have to worry about telling new partners. If you and your husband both have it, you don't have to worry about abstaining between outbreaks or using protection because you cannot reinfect each other.
As for your sex drive... physically, a lowered sex drive is not one of the symptoms of herpes. BUT, most sex drive issues are psychological. Having herpes can be a traumatic experience. You are obviously thinking about it, worrying about, etc. and that is what kills the sex drive! Also, if you are having pain, that is also going to be a turn off. Once you get used to this and have the pain (physical and emotional) under control, you should be fine.